FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE  PLANET WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF  US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH,  WE HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT  LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT  AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE  LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT  IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE  SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER OF  THE  GALAXY  AT VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY  IS  MOVING TOWARD ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE  GALAXY. AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE ALL  THIS,  DESPITE  ALL OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO PROGRAMMES  OUT IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE        HAS      ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY  IT'S BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE STAR  (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT  KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK  EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE DOING  (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO SMOKE  MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR  AND  TRY TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING