....,~/^%¤                                          ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤#                                          #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤##                                          ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤###                                          ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤##                                          ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤#             #...~~~~~~~~...#             #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤      ####.~~ FERMI'S PARADOX ~~.####     ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^%             #...~~~~~~~~...#             %^/~,.....
......,~/^                                          ^/~,......
.......,~/ ON  EARTH (THE PLANET  WHERE  I LIVE)  A /~,.......
........,~ LOT OF  US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON OUR  HOUSES ~,........
.......,~/ OR   BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT  LARGE /~,.......
......,~/^ ANTENNAS FOR  LARGER  BANDWITH,  WE HAVE ^/~,......
.....,~/^%      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     %^/~,.....
....,~/^%¤   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤# INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE AS  FUCK #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤##              ANTENNA ARRAYS              ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤### WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN  ANTENNA WITH A ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤##         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤#                                          #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤ WE'VE LEARNED  ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^%      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     %^/~,.....
......,~/^ PLACEMENT  IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND   OUR ^/~,......
.......,~/ GALAXYS  PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, /~,.......
........,~ AND  ~OUR~  LOCAL CLUSTERS PLACE IN  THE ~,........
.......,~/          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          /~,.......
......,~/^                                          ^/~,......
.....,~/^% AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT %^/~,.....
....,~/^%¤ VELOCITY AND THE  SUNS MOVING AROUND THE ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤# CENTER  OF  THE  GALAXY AT VELOCITY  AND #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤## THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING  TOWARD ANDROMEDA ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤###    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤## AROUND THE GALAXY. AND WE AS  A  SPECIES ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤# HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤                                          ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^% AND  DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL OUR %^/~,.....
......,~/^   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    ^/~,......
.......,~/ RADIO  PROGRAMMES  OUT  IN FUCKING SPACE /~,.......
........,~ AT  THE SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS OUR ~,........
.......,~/  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), /~,.......
......,~/^      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      ^/~,......
.....,~/^%     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     %^/~,.....
....,~/^%¤   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤# BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN EVERY #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤##          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤###                                          ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤## NO    .   ONE   .   HAS    .    ANSWERED ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤#                                          #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤             #...~~~~~~~~...#             ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^%     ####.~~ FERMI'S PARADOX ~~.####      %^/~,.....
......,~/^             #...~~~~~~~~...#             ^/~,......
.......,~/                                          /~,.......
........,~              SO WHY IS THAT?             ~,........
.......,~/                                          /~,.......
......,~/^ MOST  OPPONENTS TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE  IN ^/~,......
.....,~/^% THE UNIVERSE SAY IT'S BECAUSE  YOU  NEED %^/~,.....
....,~/^%¤ A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR  AND  THE ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤# PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤## DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE  STAR (LIKE THERE ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤###           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤##                                          ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤# BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT   KEEPING  THE #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^%                                          %^/~,.....
......,~/^ I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE  HAVE NO ^/~,......
.......,~/ IDEA WHAT WE'RE DOING  (AND IT  PROBABLY /~,.......
........,~                  SHOWS)                  ~,........
.......,~/                                          /~,.......
......,~/^             #...~~~~~~~~...#             ^/~,......
.....,~/^%      ####.~~ FERMI'S PARADOX ~~.####     %^/~,.....
....,~/^%¤             #...~~~~~~~~...#             ¤%^/~,....
...,~/^%¤#                                          #¤%^/~,...
..,~/^%¤## I'M GONNA GO SMOKE  MY  THIRD  CIGARETTE ##¤%^/~,..
.,~/^%¤### THIS YEAR AND TRY TO SNATCH  SOME  BEERS ###¤%^/~,.
..,~/^%¤##        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING         ##¤%^/~,..
...,~/^%¤#                                          #¤%^/~,...
....,~/^%¤                                          ¤%^/~,....
.....,~/^%                                          %^/~,.....
......,~/^                                          ^/~,......
.......,~/                                          /~,.......