EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST FEW TIMES AT LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT  I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE,  AND  THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH   RANDOM  THINGS  THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD NOT  SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD  AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT  LEAST THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT  MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT SHIT, 
 WHAT  A  LOAD OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,   NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN  I  HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT  I THINK IT HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.