dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything  is completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over my  vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i  can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my  eyes are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen  if you wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick  on the nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you do  with a cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...