THE   GOLDEN        
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS  AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A  TAVERN  AFTER A 
 FEW  YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN  THE  DAY SHE SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE  SOLD HER  WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD  A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE   TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER AND 
 SHORTER TIME  IN EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON  ENOUGH THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY  STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID THE  CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I MEAN)) AND  AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT  OF A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME  RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING.  THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN THE PROCESS  OF  FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR  NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,    HE   VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT  KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP  ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON  FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED  FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO  HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE GOT  SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!