RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.......#.. »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ##...####.
######...# #..#..##..
.####..#.. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ..........
..##...... THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .#########
.....##### ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..#######.
####..#### CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ...#####..
.##....### ##..###...
....##..## MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #....#..##
.##......# THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ..##......
....####.. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO #....#####
.##..##..# THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ..##..###.
.......... WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE #......#..
#########. DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ..####...#
########.. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ...##..#..
.######..# ##........
..####.... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ...#######
...##..### CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ##..#####.
##......## COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #....###..
...####... WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..##..#...
##..##..## OPERATION. ........##
#......... #######..#
..######## SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .#####....
#..######. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ..###..###
....####.. #..#....##
.##..##... »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» .....##...
........## »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» .###....##
.######... ..#..##...
..####..## »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» #.......##
...##..... »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ..#####...
##....#### »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ...###..##
#..##..##. »»# AND AT EASE #»» ##..#....#
.......... ......##..
########## »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» #####....#
########## »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» .###..##..
.######### »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ..#.......
..######## #...######
...####### »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ..#..####.
##..###### »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» #.....##..
.....##### »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ..###.....
####..#### »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» #..#..####
###....##. »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» .......###
##..##.... ######..##
#......### »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» #####....#
~~~»~ ~ »»~ ~ »~ ~»
~ ~~ ~ ~ . ~. .
. . $ .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.