dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language,  sentences  i can't hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then i  realize  i  can't hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the nose,  that's 
 what  these are.  like you do with a cat 
 who  comes to close  to your sandwich...