dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything is  completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language,  sentences  i can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick  on  the nose, that's 
 what these are. like  you do  with a cat 
 who  comes to close to your  sandwich...