party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower curtains  drawn. floor  full 
 of  dirty  clothes, of garbage, and as i 
 start to  unzip my pants,  she steps out 
 of  the   shower  and   pushes   me   to 
 theground. 
  
 i  wish  to   be   contacted   by   some 
 [god, alien]  who would  bestow  upon me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right  forever. what i  don't 
 know  is  that   this  happens  multiple 
 times  per  second - they  ask me: "when 
 you  said the  world egg was  your ideal 
 body type, did you  mean  it"?  i answer 
 "not really, but i can  act like it  for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of  the encounter  and  moved on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom