RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨@¨¨@¨¨¨@@
¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨@@@@@ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨@@@@¨¨¨@@
¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨
@@@@@¨¨@¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
@@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨@@@@@¨¨@
@@@¨¨@@@@@ @¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@@@¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨@@@@@@
@¨¨@@@@@¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨@@¨¨@@@@@
¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@@
¨@@¨¨@¨¨@@ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨@@@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
@@@@@@@@¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨@@@@@
@@@@@@@¨¨@ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @@@@¨¨@@@@
@@@@@@¨¨¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@
@@@@@¨¨@@¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@
@@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@@@¨¨@@@@¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨¨@@@@¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨ @@@¨¨@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
¨@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨¨@@@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@
¨@¨¨¨¨@@@@ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨@@@ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¨¨@@@@@@
¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@ @@@¨¨@@@@¨
¨¨¨@@@@¨¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» @@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
@@¨¨@@¨¨@@ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» @¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨¨@@@@@@@@ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨@@@@¨¨¨¨¨
@¨¨@@@@@@@ ¨¨@@¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨¨@@@@@@ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨@@¨¨@@@@¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨@@@@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
@@@@@¨¨¨¨¨ @@¨¨¨¨@@@@
@@@@¨¨@@@@ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» @¨¨@@¨¨@@@
@@@¨¨¨¨@@@ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
@@¨¨@@¨¨@@ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨@@@@@@¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¨@@@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@@@@@@@@ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» @¨¨@@¨¨@@¨
@¨¨@@@@@@@ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@@@@@@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨@@@@@@@@¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.