RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨¨§§¨§§§¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ §¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨§§¨§¨§§                                          ¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨§§ THE COMPUTER  IS A VERY COMMON  TOOL  IN ¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨§¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME  WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨ ITS  JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS  OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A  SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§ MOST  WORK  ON THE  PRINCIPLES OF POSING §¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§ THE PROBLEM  ON A HILBERT  PLANE,  WHICH ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT  OF CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE   THE  PROBLEM §¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    §§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨         COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)          ¨§§§¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨                                          ¨§¨§§¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨¨¨§§§¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§ CLERKS TO  PRAY  TO  THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO  THE  DAEMONS  DOING THE ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨ WORK,  FOR  A  QUICK  AND   FAULT   FREE ¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§                OPERATION.                ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨§¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨§¨¨      ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~      ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨§¨        ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~        ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨§                                          §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨     ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~     ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨    ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~    ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§     ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~     §¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§           ~~# AND AT EASE #~~            ¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§                                          ¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§     ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~     §¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨     ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~     ¨§¨¨§¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨   ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~   ¨¨§¨¨§¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨    ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~   ¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨     ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~    ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨    ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~     §¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨      ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~     §§¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨       ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~        ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
           ^^^~^      ^   ~~^   ^           ~^   ^~           
           ^     ^^     ^     ^     ¨      ^¨     ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO     BE    A    KIND     OF    PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,    YOU   MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS  IN,   YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL   OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,   LOTS    OF    IT.