LIFE                
                                    
                                    
                                          
    A MULTITUDE OF DEFINITIONS      
       DOES    NOT   HELP.   WE       
      CAN     SAY     "LIFE     IS      
       WHAT   WE    ARE,   AND        
       WHAT  THINGS  LIKE  US       
       ARE",   BUT   THEN   WE        
     MUST    ALSO    DEFINE    WHAT     
     "THINGS  LIKE  US"  ACTUALLY     
      ENTAILS,  HOW  IT  SHOULD     
      BE   MEASURED,   WHO   OR       
      WHAT    IS    THE    ARBITER,     
      AND   SO   INSTEAD   THERE      
          IS   THIS    INTERNATIONALLY 
 SANCTIONED     LIST                   
           OF CRITERIA          
                                          
 - LIFE MUST PRODUCE OR CONSUME MILK      
 - LIFE MUST HAVE A BEGINNING AND AN END  
 - LIFE CAN HAVE DREAMS AND CAN INTERACT  
 - LIFE CAN STEAL                         
 - LIFE CAN BE CURSED