RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.&&.&&..&& ---------------------------------------- &&...&&&&&
&.&&.&.&.& .&..&....&
&&.&&&&&&& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&.&&...&.
.&&......& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .&&.&..&&&
&.&.....&& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &.&&&.&..&
&&&....&.& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &&..&&&.&.
..&...&&&. .&.&..&&&&
.&&..&..&& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&&&.&...&
&.&.&&.&.& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ...&&&..&&
&&&&.&&&&. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ..&..&.&..
...&&...&. THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .&&.&&&&.&
..&.&..&&. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &.&&...&&&
.&&&&.&.&& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&.&..&..&
&...&&&&.& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) .&&&.&&.&&
&..&...&&. &..&&.&&..
&.&&..&.&. IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &.&.&&.&.&
&&.&.&&&&. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&&&.&&&&.
.&&&&...&& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ...&&...&&
&...&..&.& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..&.&..&.&
&..&&.&&&. OPERATION. .&&&&.&&&.
&.&.&&..&. &...&&..&&
&&&&.&.&&. SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &..&.&.&..
...&&&&.&& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &.&&&&&&.&
..&...&&.& &&.....&&&
.&&..&.&&. --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #-- .&....&..&
&.&.&&&.&. --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #-- &&...&&.&&
&&&&..&&&. .&..&.&&..
...&.&..&. --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #-- &&.&&&.&.&
..&&&&.&&. --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #-- .&&..&&&&&
.&...&&.&. --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #-- &.&.&....&
&&..&.&&&. --# AND AT EASE #-- &&&&&...&&
.&.&&&..&& ....&..&..
&&&..&.&.& --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #-- ...&&.&&..
..&.&&&&&. --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #-- ..&.&&.&.&
.&&&....&& --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #-- .&&&.&&&&&
&..&...&.& &..&&....&
&.&&..&&&& --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #-- &.&.&...&.
&&.&.&.... --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #-- &&&&&..&&&
.&&&&&...& --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #-- ....&.&...
&....&..&. --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #-- ...&&&&...
&...&&.&&& --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #-- ..&...&..&
&..&.&&..& .&&..&&.&.
&.&&&.&.&. ---------------------------------------- &.&.&.&&&&
:::-: : --: : -: :-
: :: : : . :. .
. . ^ .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.