RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨# ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨#¨¨¨¨##¨
¨¨¨¨¨###¨¨ #¨¨#¨¨¨###
#¨¨¨¨#¨##¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ##¨¨#¨¨#¨#
##¨¨¨¨¨### THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ###¨¨#¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨¨¨#¨# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL #¨##¨¨#¨¨#
¨###¨¨¨¨¨# CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨###¨¨#¨¨
¨#¨##¨¨¨¨# ¨¨#¨##¨¨#¨
¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨###¨¨#
#¨¨#¨##¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH #¨¨¨#¨##¨¨
¨#¨¨¨###¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ##¨¨¨¨###¨
¨¨#¨¨#¨##¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨##¨¨¨#¨##
#¨¨#¨¨¨### WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨###¨¨¨¨##
##¨¨#¨¨#¨# DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨#¨##¨¨¨#¨
###¨¨#¨¨¨# COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨
#¨##¨¨#¨¨# #¨¨#¨##¨¨¨
¨¨###¨¨#¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ##¨¨¨###¨¨
¨¨#¨##¨¨#¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ###¨¨#¨##¨
¨¨¨¨###¨¨# COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #¨##¨¨¨###
#¨¨¨#¨##¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨###¨¨#¨#
##¨¨¨¨###¨ OPERATION. ¨¨#¨##¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨¨#¨## ¨¨¨¨###¨¨#
¨###¨¨¨¨## SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨¨#¨##¨¨
¨#¨##¨¨¨#¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¨¨¨¨###¨
¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨##
#¨¨#¨##¨¨¨ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨##
##¨¨¨###¨¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨
###¨¨#¨##¨ #¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
#¨##¨¨¨### ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ##¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨###¨¨#¨# ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ###¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨#¨##¨¨¨# ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ #¨##¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨###¨¨# ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨¨###¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨#¨##¨¨ ¨¨#¨##¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨###¨ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ¨¨¨¨###¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨## ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ #¨¨¨#¨##¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨## ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ¨#¨¨¨¨###¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨ ¨¨#¨¨¨#¨##
#¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨##
##¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨#¨
###¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨
#¨##¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨
¨¨###¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ #¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨¨
¨¨#¨##¨¨¨¨ ¨#¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨
¨¨¨¨###¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨¨#
^^^~^ ^ ~~^ ^ ~^ ^~
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.