RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
£..£..£££. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ .£........
.£..£.£.££ ..£.......
..£.....££ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN £..£......
...£....£. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .£..£.....
....£..... ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..£..£....
.....£.... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ...£..£...
......£... ....£..£..
.......£.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING .....£..£.
........£. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ......£..£
£........£ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO £......£..
.£........ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .£......£.
..£....... WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ..£......£
£..£...... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ...£......
.£..£..... COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ....£.....
..£..£.... £....£....
...£..£... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ££....£...
....£..£.. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR £££....£..
.....£..£. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE £.££....£.
......£..£ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..£££....£
£......£.. OPERATION. ..£.££....
.£......£. ....£££...
..£......£ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY £...£.££..
...£...... NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .£....£££.
....£..... ..£...£.££
£....£.... ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ...£....££
££....£... ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ....£...£.
£££....£.. £....£....
£.££....£. ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ££....£...
..£££....£ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ .££....£..
..£.££.... ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ .£££....£.
....£££... ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ .£.££....£
£...£.££.. ...£££....
.£....£££. ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ...£.££...
..£...£.££ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ .....£££..
...£....££ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ £....£.££.
....£...£. .£.....£££
£....£.... ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ..£....£.£
££....£... ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ...£.....£
.££....£.. ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ ....£....£
.£££....£. ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ £....£....
.£.££....£ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ££....£...
...£££.... £££....£..
...£.££... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ £.££....£.
~~~~~ ~ ~~~ ~ ~~ ~~
~ ~~ ~ ~ . ~. .
. . § .
.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.