RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» @¨@¨¨@@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ OPERATION. @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨@¨@¨ @¨@¨@¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨@@¨@¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» @¨@¨@¨@¨@@
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.