RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&&.&.....& ======================================== .....&.&&.
&&..&....& .......&&.
&&&..&...& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &......&&.
&.&&..&... THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&.....&&.
..&&&..&.. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&&....&&.
..&.&&..&. CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &.&&...&&&
&...&&&..& ..&&&..&.&
&&..&.&&.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ..&.&&...&
.&&...&&&. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ....&&&..&
.&&&..&.&& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ....&.&&..
.&.&&...&& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &.....&&&.
...&&&..&. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE .&....&.&&
&..&.&&... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ..&.....&&
&&...&&&.. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &..&....&.
&&&..&.&&. .&..&.....
&.&&...&&& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..&..&....
..&&&..&.& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ...&..&...
..&.&&...& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ....&..&..
....&&&..& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .....&..&.
....&.&&.. OPERATION. ......&..&
&.....&&&. .......&..
.&....&.&& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &.......&.
..&.....&& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .&.......&
&..&....&. ..&.......
.&..&..... ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== ...&......
..&..&.... ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ....&.....
...&..&... .....&....
....&..&.. ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== &.....&...
.....&..&. ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== &&.....&..
......&..& ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== &&&.....&.
.......&.. ==# AND AT EASE #== &.&&.....&
&.......&. ..&&&.....
.&.......& ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== ..&.&&....
..&....... ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== &...&&&...
...&...... ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== &&..&.&&..
....&..... .&&...&&&.
.....&.... ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== .&&&..&.&&
&.....&... ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== .&.&&...&&
&&.....&.. ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ...&&&..&.
&&&.....&. ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ...&.&&...
&.&&.....& ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== .....&&&..
..&&&..... .....&.&&.
..&.&&.... ======================================== &......&&&
---=- - ==- - =- -=
- -- - - . -. .
. . ยง .
.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.