dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile.  i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences  i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape.  to crawl on the floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick  on  the nose,  that's 
 what these  are. like you do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close to your  sandwich...