THE  GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN A  THOUSAND YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN  IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN  TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD HER  WARES, AND  IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE  CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE  OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.   THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND  SOON  ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME  WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID  THE CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND  AS SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA TO  FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED  THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A HARDHAT  AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING.  THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO  THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT  EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE    VOWED   TO   LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE  ENDED UP ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON  FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS,  HE SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT  SCAMMED OUT OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS, WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!