THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND YEARS  AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE  DAY SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE  EVE SHE SOLD  HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A  REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED  ABOUT THE GOLDEN  M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD  THEIR MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE  BECAME A  LITTLE TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.   THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION.  SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN THEY  STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE HID THE  CART,  AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE   CART.  HE  WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND  AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME  RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS  KIND  OF  A HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T  CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS IN THE  PROCESS  OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE   VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT  HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE  ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD,  AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!