dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the   fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile.  i can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't  hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless, but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick on the  nose,  that's 
 what these are. like  you do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...