dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything is completely  calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander too  far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick  on the nose, that's 
 what these are. like you  do with a  cat 
 who  comes to close to your  sandwich...