EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING    TO   STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM,  THE  LAST FEW TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT  I 
 REALLY  DO NOT LIKE,  AND THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED OR AT  LEAST  THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE  EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,   THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK  TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED  AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD OF CONCEPTS THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO  LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I  THINK IT  HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.