EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN THE  WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO  NOT  KNOW HOW  USEFUL THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST  FEW  TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE  ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO  NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM  THINGS   THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN  ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,   THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST  DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,   NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND  (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS  TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.