FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE PLANET WHERE  I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF  US HAVE  ANTENNAS  ON OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,   WE  HAVE  BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
     BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR      
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE  VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT  OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN  THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR LOCAL CLUSTERS PLACE  IN  THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE  SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE  GALAXY  AT VELOCITY AND 
 THE  GALAXY  IS MOVING  TOWARD ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL  OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO PROGRAMMES  OUT  IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT THE SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS  OUR 
  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), 
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY IT'S BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT   REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE  HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT  WE'RE DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO SMOKE  MY  THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR AND TRY TO  SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING