EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO  NOT  KNOW HOW USEFUL THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE  EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT LIKE,  AND THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD  AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT   DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT  MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I  HEAR THIS  SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS  ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.