EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I    WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST  FEW TIMES  AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE  EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE, AND  THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM  THINGS   THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE, FOR  A 
 LONG TIME  I  COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT  LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO  MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND  MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD  OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT  WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I HEAR  THIS SOUND (A  REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT I THINK IT HAS  TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.