EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I    WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN THE  WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY? I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST FEW  TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD AVOID  TO  RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR AT LEAST  THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO  MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD  OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW  AND  THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT  IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.