EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN THE  WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF  SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO  NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I  SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST  THE BURN-INS IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO  MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN  I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT I  THINK IT HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.