EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I    WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW  TIMES AT LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT  I 
 REALLY  DO NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR AT  LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY   DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I  JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK  WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN  I  HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT I THINK IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.