EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL  THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST  FEW TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF  SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT  LIKE, AND THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM   THINGS  THAT  I 
 HAPPEN TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD NOT  SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT LEAST  THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT   DO  IT 
 BEFORE.  BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND  MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN  I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,   NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW  AND  THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO  STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK IT HAS  TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.