RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@¨¨@¨@@@@¨ ======================================== @¨@¨¨¨@¨¨@
¨@¨@@@¨¨¨@ @@@@¨¨@@¨@
@@@@¨¨@¨¨@ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨¨¨@¨@¨@@
¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨@ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨@@@@@¨
¨¨¨¨@@@¨@@ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨@
¨@¨¨@@¨@¨@ ¨¨¨¨@¨@¨¨@
@@@¨@¨@@@@ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨@@@@¨@
¨¨¨@@@@¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @¨¨¨@¨¨¨@@
@¨¨@¨¨¨@¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @@¨¨@@¨¨@¨
@@¨@@¨¨@@¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨@¨@¨@¨@@
¨¨@@¨@¨@¨@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨@@@@@@@¨
¨¨@¨@@@@@@ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨ @¨@¨@¨¨¨¨@
@@¨@¨@@¨¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨@@@@@¨¨¨@
¨¨@@@@¨@¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨@
@¨@¨¨¨@@@¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨@@¨¨¨@@¨@
¨@@@¨¨@¨¨@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE @@¨@¨¨@¨@@
@@¨¨@¨@@¨@ OPERATION. ¨¨@@@¨@@@¨
@¨@¨@@@¨@@ @¨@¨¨@@¨¨@
¨@@@@¨¨@@¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @@@@¨@¨@¨@
@@¨¨¨@¨@¨@ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨¨¨@@@@@@
¨¨@¨¨@@@@@ @@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨@@¨@¨¨¨¨ ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== ¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨@@@¨¨¨ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨¨@@@¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@@@¨¨@¨¨ @¨@¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨@¨¨@¨@@¨ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== @@@@¨@¨¨@¨
¨¨@@¨@@@¨@ ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== @¨¨¨@@@¨@@
@¨@¨@@¨¨@@ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ¨@¨¨@¨¨@@¨
@@@@@¨@¨@¨ ==# AND AT EASE #== @@@¨@@¨@¨@
¨¨¨¨¨@@@@@ @¨¨@@¨@@@@
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== ¨@¨@¨@@¨¨¨
@@¨¨¨@@¨¨¨ ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ¨@@@@@¨@¨¨
@¨@¨¨@¨@¨¨ ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== ¨@¨¨¨¨@@@¨
@@@@¨@@@@¨ @@@¨¨¨@¨¨@
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨@ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== ¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨@
@¨¨¨@¨@¨¨@ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ¨¨¨@@¨@¨@@
¨@¨¨@@@@¨@ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== @¨¨@¨@@@@¨
¨@@¨@¨¨¨@@ ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== @@¨@@@¨¨¨@
@@¨@@@¨¨@¨ ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== @¨@@¨¨@¨¨@
¨¨@@¨¨@¨@@ ¨@@¨@¨@@¨@
@¨@¨@¨@@@¨ ======================================== ¨@¨@@@@¨@@
~~~=~ ~ ==~ ~ =~ ~=
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.