EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I    WAS   THINKING   TO   STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO NOT  LIKE, AND  THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM  THINGS   THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN ALL  THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED OR  AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO   IT 
 BEFORE. BUT  MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE  I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD OF  CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT  WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,   NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND  (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I THINK IT HAS  TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.