EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I    WAS   THINKING    TO   STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW USEFUL  THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS  THAT I 
 REALLY DO NOT  LIKE, AND  THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM   THINGS  THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE, FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD  AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR AT  LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,   THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO  MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD OF  CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK  WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW  AND  THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT IS  ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO  STRESSFUL,  BUT I THINK IT HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.