RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨&¨¨¨¨&&& ======================================== &&¨&¨&&&&¨
¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨& ¨&&&&¨¨¨&¨
&¨&¨¨&&¨&& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &¨¨¨&¨¨&&¨
&&&¨&¨&&¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &¨¨&&¨&¨&&
¨¨&&&&¨&¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &¨&¨&&&&¨¨
¨&¨¨¨&&&¨& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &&&&¨¨¨&¨¨
&&¨¨&¨¨&&& ¨¨¨&¨¨&&¨¨
¨&¨&&¨&¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨&&¨&¨&¨&
&&&¨&&&¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨&¨&&&&&&&
¨¨&&¨¨&¨¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &&&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨&¨&&¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
&&&&&¨&¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨&&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨&
¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &&&¨¨¨¨¨&&
¨¨&&¨&&¨&¨ ¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨&
¨&¨&&¨&&&¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨&&¨¨¨&&&&
&&&¨&&¨¨&¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &¨&¨¨&¨¨¨&
¨¨&&¨&¨&&& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&&¨&&¨¨&¨
¨&¨&&&&¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨&&¨&¨&&¨
&&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨ OPERATION. ¨&¨&&&&¨&¨
¨¨&¨¨&&¨¨¨ &&&¨¨¨&&&&
¨&&¨&¨&¨¨& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨&
&¨&&&&&¨&& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨&&¨&&¨¨&&
&&¨¨¨¨&&¨& &¨&&¨&¨&¨¨
¨&¨¨¨&¨&&¨ ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== &&¨&&&&&¨&
&&¨¨&&&¨&¨ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨&&¨¨¨¨&&&
¨&¨&¨¨&&&& &¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨
&&&&¨&¨¨¨¨ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== &&&¨¨&&¨¨¨
¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨& ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== ¨¨&¨&¨&¨¨&
¨¨&¨¨&¨¨&¨ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ¨&&&&&&¨&&
¨&&¨&&¨&&& ==# AND AT EASE #== &¨¨¨¨¨&&¨&
&¨&&¨&&¨¨¨ &¨¨¨¨&¨&&&
&&¨&&¨&¨¨& ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== &¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨
¨&&¨&&&¨&¨ ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== &¨¨&¨¨&¨¨&
&¨&&¨¨&&&¨ ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== &¨&&¨&&¨&&
&&¨&¨&¨¨&¨ &&¨&&¨&&¨¨
¨&&&&&¨&&¨ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== ¨&&¨&&¨&¨&
&¨¨¨¨&&¨&¨ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== &¨&&¨&&&&&
&¨¨¨&¨&&&& ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== &&¨&&¨¨¨¨¨
&¨¨&&&¨¨¨& ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ¨&&¨&¨¨¨¨&
&¨&¨¨&¨¨&¨ ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== &¨&&&¨¨¨&¨
&&&¨&&¨&&¨ &&¨¨&¨¨&&&
¨¨&&¨&&¨&& ======================================== ¨&¨&&¨&¨¨¨
:::=: : ==: : =: :=
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
¨ ¨ % ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.