THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN A  THOUSAND  YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD  SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN THE  DAY SHE  SLEPT,  IN 
 THE  EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED  ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD TAVERN  HAD  THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME  A LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS   MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING  FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE HID  THE  CART,  AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE   WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED, I MEAN))  AND  AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE  WASN'T ALL THAT OF A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A HARDHAT  AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD  EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS  OF FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE    VOWED   TO   LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE  ENDED UP ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON  FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR  COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS  JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT SCAMMED OUT OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS, WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!