THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND  YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS  APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES,  OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE DAY SHE  SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD HER  WARES, AND IN  THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED  IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE TALKED  ABOUT  THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN HAD  THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON   HER 
 TRAIL, SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION.  SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND  SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING  FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID THE CART,  AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS   A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL  THAT OF  A COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING.  THE TAVERN DIDN'T  CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN THE  PROCESS OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY  AT EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,   HE    VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP  ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED  FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY,  THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE GOT  SCAMMED OUT OF THE  CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!