FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH (THE  PLANET  WHERE  I LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF US  HAVE  ANTENNAS  ON OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,   WE  HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR LARGER  BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE  AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN  ANTENNA WITH A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION  IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN  THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL  CLUSTERS PLACE IN  THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING  AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE GALAXY AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING  TOWARD ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE  ALL THIS, DESPITE  ALL  OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO PROGRAMMES  OUT IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE SPEED  OF LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO  INTELLIGENT  LIFE IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S  BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY  FROM THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I  THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT  WE'RE  DOING (AND IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO  SMOKE  MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR  AND TRY  TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING