FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH  (THE  PLANET WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT  OF US HAVE ANTENNAS ON  OUR  HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR LARGER  BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
     BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR      
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE  BUILT LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE  VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED  ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT  IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL  CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS  PLACE IN  THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING  AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF THE  GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS MOVING  TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND  THE  GALAXY. AND WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE ALL  THIS,  DESPITE ALL OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES  OUT IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT (LIGHT IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO  INTELLIGENT  LIFE IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY  IT'S BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT   KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK  EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA  WHAT WE'RE DOING (AND IT  PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO SMOKE  MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND  TRY  TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING