FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE  PLANET  WHERE I  LIVE) A 
 LOT OF  US HAVE ANTENNAS ON  OUR  HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,   WE  HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS FOR  LARGER BANDWITH,  WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE  BUILT  LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY  BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE  LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT   IN   THE   GALAXY,  AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS  PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR LOCAL  CLUSTERS  PLACE IN  THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS  MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE GALAXY  AT VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS MOVING  TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND  THE GALAXY. AND WE AS  A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL  OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO PROGRAMMES OUT  IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS OUR 
  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), 
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF  ALL OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO      ONE       HAS        ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE  UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A  CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE  STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT   KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK  EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE  DOING  (AND IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO  SMOKE MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND TRY  TO SNATCH  SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING