dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to  piece   together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and   i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind.  it's like 
 language, sentences  i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in my  mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i  can't  hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such is my nature.  turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick on the  nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you do with  a cat 
 who comes to close  to your  sandwich...