RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
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&&&,,,,,&& &&&&,,&&&&
&&,,&&&,,& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&&,,,,&&&
&,,,,&,,,, THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&,,&&,,&&
,,&&,,,&&, ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &,,,,,,,,&
,,,,,&,,,, CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ,,&&&&&&,,
&&&&,,,&&& ,,,&&&&,,&
&&&,,&,,&& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&,,&&,,,,
,&,,,,,,,, THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ,,,,,,,&&,
,,,&&&&&&& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &&&&&&,,,,
&&,,&&&&&& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&&&&,,&&&
&,,,,&&&&& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &&&&,,,,&&
,,&&,,&&&& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ,&&,,&&,,&
,,,,,,,&&, COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ,,,,,,,,,,
&&&&&&,,,, &&&&&&&&&&
&&&&&,,&&, IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &&&&&&&&&&
&&&&,,,,,, CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&&&&&&&&&
&&&,,&&&&& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&&&&&&&&&
&&,,,,&&&& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ,&&&&&&&&&
&,,&&,,&&& OPERATION. ,,&&&&&&&&
,,,,,,,,&& ,,,&&&&&&&
,&&&&&&,,, SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&,,&&&&&,
,,&&&&,,&& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ,,,,,&&&,,
&,,&&,,,,& &&&&,,&,,&
,,,,,,&&,, »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ,&&,,,,,,,
&&&&&,,,,, »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ,,,,&&&&&&
&&&&,,&&&& &&&,,&&&&&
&&&,,,,&&& »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» &&,,,,&&&&
&&,,&&,,&& »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» &,,&&,,&&&
&,,,,,,,,, »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ,,,,,,,,&&
,,&&&&&&&& »»# AND AT EASE #»» &&&&&&&,,&
,,,&&&&&&& &&&&&&,,,,
&&,,&&&&&& »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» &&&&&,,&&&
&,,,,&&&&, »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» &&&&,,,,&&
,,&&,,&&,, »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» &&&,,&&,,&
,,,,,,,,,, &&,,,,,,,,
&&&&&&&&&& »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ,,,&&&&&&&
&&&&&&&&&& »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» &&,,&&&&&&
&&&&&&&&&& »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ,,,,,&&&&&
&&&&&&&&&& »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» &&&&,,&&&&
&&&&&&&&&& »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» &&&,,,,&&&
&&&&&&&&&& &&,,&&,,&&
&&&&&&&&&& »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ,,,,,,,,,&
^^^»^ ^ »»^ ^ »^ ^»
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.