party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower curtains  drawn. floor  full 
 of  dirty clothes, of  garbage, and as i 
 start to unzip  my pants,  she steps out 
 of   the  shower  and   pushes   me   to 
 theground. 
  
 i   wish  to   be   contacted   by  some 
 [god, alien] who would  bestow  upon  me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything  right forever. what  i don't 
 know  is   that  this  happens  multiple 
 times per  second -  they ask me:  "when 
 you  said  the world egg  was your ideal 
 body type, did you  mean  it"?  i answer 
 "not really, but i  can act like it  for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of the  encounter  and moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom