EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW TIMES AT LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE, AND THERE  WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD AVOID  TO RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT LEAST  THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY   DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE  I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE  I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD  OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN  I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.