EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW  TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS  THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE, AND THERE  WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM  THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG TIME  I  COULD  NOT  SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD  AVOID TO RUIN ALL  THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE.  BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE.  MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST FIELDS  AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND  (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS  TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.