dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the   fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize  i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my  nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick  on the nose,  that's 
 what  these are.  like you do with a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...