dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over my vision, pressing  in,  being 
 almost hostile.  i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i  can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the floor  searching 
 relief, such is  my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen  if you wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you do with  a cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...