THE   GOLDEN         
              M               
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD  SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE  DAY  SHE SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER  WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A  LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON   HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME  WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY  YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS   FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A  GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL  THAT OF A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH  SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO  THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN  THE  PROCESS OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE    VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT  HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING  OUT  THAT EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR  COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE  EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT OF THE  CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!