THE   GOLDEN         
              M               
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN A  THOUSAND YEARS  AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN  IDEA. 
 IT WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE DAY  SHE SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE  CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT THE  GOLDEN  M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE BECAME A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE   TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION. SHE  FELT 
 HUNTED. AND  SOON  ENOUGH THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME  WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID  THE CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE   WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE  WASN'T ALL THAT OF A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND  OF  A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS  OF FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT  EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE    VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW  HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR  COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND  TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!