THE   GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN  TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE  SOLD HER WARES, AND  IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A  REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT THE  GOLDEN  M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME A  LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE   TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME  IN EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND  SOON  ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY  STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID  THE  CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT  IT A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF A COOK,  AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS  KIND  OF A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE  FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY  HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS  OF FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE  FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH  ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR COW  MEAT 
 INSTEAD,  AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT OF  THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!