RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&..&&..&.. »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ....&&&..&
&.&.&.&&.& ...&..&.&.
&&&&&&.&&. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ..&&.&&&&&
.....&&.&& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .&.&&.....
....&.&&.& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&&.&.....
...&&&.&&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ..&&&.....
..&..&&..& .&..&.....
.&&.&.&.&& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&.&&.....
&.&&&&&&.. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .&&.&.....
&&.....&.& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &.&&&....&
.&....&&&. THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&..&...&.
&&...&..&. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE .&.&&..&&.
.&..&&.&&. DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&&.&.&.&&
&&.&.&&.&& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ..&&&&&&.&
.&&&&.&&.. .&.....&&.
&...&&.&.& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &&....&.&.
&..&.&&&&& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .&...&&&&&
&.&&&..... COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&..&.....
&&..&....& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .&.&&....&
.&.&&...&& OPERATION. &&&.&...&.
&&&.&..&.& ..&&&..&&.
..&&&.&&&. SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .&..&.&.&&
.&..&&..&. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &&.&&&&&.&
&&.&.&.&&& .&&....&&&
.&&&&&&... »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» &.&...&...
&.....&..& »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» &&&..&&...
&....&&.&& ..&.&.&..&
&...&.&&.. »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» .&&&&&&.&.
&..&&&.&.& »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» &.....&&&&
&.&..&&&&. »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» &....&....
&&&.&...&& »»# AND AT EASE #»» &...&&...&
..&&&..&.& &..&.&..&.
.&..&.&&&. »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» &.&&&&.&&.
&&.&&&..&& »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» &&...&&.&.
.&&..&.&.& »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» .&..&.&&&&
&.&.&&&&&. &&.&&&...&
&&&&....&& »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» .&&..&..&.
...&...&.& »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» &.&.&&.&&&
..&&..&&&. »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» &&&&.&&..&
.&.&.&..&. »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ...&&.&.&&
&&&&&&.&&. »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ..&.&&&&.&
.....&&.&. .&&&...&&.
....&.&&&. »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» &..&..&.&.
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.