RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ ======================================== ¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨
&&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨ ¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨
&¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨
¨¨&&&¨¨¨&¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨ &&¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&&¨¨¨¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨¨&¨&& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH &¨&&¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨&& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨&&&¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨&¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨ ¨&¨¨¨¨&¨&&
&¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨&&
&&¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨
&&&¨¨¨¨¨¨& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨
&¨&&¨¨¨¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨¨&&&¨¨¨¨¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &¨¨¨¨&¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨ ¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨&¨&& ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== &¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨&& ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨&
&¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨ ¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== ¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨ ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== &¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== &&¨¨¨&¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨ ==# AND AT EASE #== &&&¨¨¨&¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨&¨¨&¨ &¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨& ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== ¨¨&&&¨¨¨&¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨ ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨&
&¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨ ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== &¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨
¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨& &&¨¨&¨&&¨¨
¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨¨ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== ¨&&¨¨¨&&&¨
¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨¨ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ¨&&&¨¨&¨&&
&¨¨¨&¨¨&¨¨ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ¨&¨&&¨¨¨&&
&&¨¨¨&¨¨&¨ ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ¨¨¨&&&¨¨&¨
&&&¨¨¨&¨¨& ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== ¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨
&¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨ &¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨
¨¨&&&¨¨¨&¨ ======================================== &&¨¨¨&¨&&¨
:::=: : ==: : =: :=
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
¨ ¨ * ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.