RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@¨@@¨@¨@¨@ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨¨¨@@¨@¨¨@
¨@@¨@@@@@@ @¨¨@¨@@@¨@
@@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨@¨@@@¨¨@@
¨¨@@¨@¨¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. @@@@¨¨@¨@¨
¨¨@¨@@@¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨@¨@@@@
@¨@@@¨¨@¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨
@@@¨¨@¨@@¨ @¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨
@¨¨@¨@@@¨@ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @@¨¨@@¨@@¨
@@¨@@@¨¨@@ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨@¨@¨@@¨@
¨¨@@¨¨@¨@¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @¨@@@@@¨@@
@¨@¨@¨@@@@ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @@@¨¨¨¨@@¨
@@@@@@@¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @¨¨@¨¨¨@¨@
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @@¨@@¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @¨@@¨@¨@¨¨
@@¨¨¨¨¨@¨@ ¨@@¨@@@@@¨
@¨@¨¨¨¨@@@ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨¨@¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨@@@¨@¨¨¨@
@@¨¨@¨¨@@¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @@¨¨@@@¨¨@
¨¨@¨@@¨@¨@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨@¨@¨¨@¨@
@¨@@@¨@@@@ OPERATION. ¨¨@@@@¨@@@
¨@@¨¨@@¨¨¨ @¨@¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨@¨@¨@¨@¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨@@@¨¨@¨@¨
¨@@@@@@@@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨@¨¨@¨@@@@
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ @@@¨@@@¨¨¨
@¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« @¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨
@@@@¨¨¨¨¨@ ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« @@¨@¨@¨@@¨
@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@ @¨@@@@@@¨@
¨@¨¨@@¨¨¨@ ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« @@@¨¨¨¨¨@@
@@@¨@¨@¨¨@ ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« @¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨
@¨¨@@@@@¨@ ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« ¨@¨@@¨¨¨@@
¨@¨@¨¨¨¨@@ ««# AND AT EASE #«« @@@@¨@¨¨@¨
¨@@@@¨¨¨@¨ @¨¨¨@@@¨@@
@@¨¨¨@¨¨@@ ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ¨@¨¨@¨¨@@¨
@¨@¨¨@@¨@¨ ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ¨@@¨@@¨@¨@
¨@@@¨@¨@@@ ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ¨@¨@@¨@@@@
@@¨¨@@@@¨¨ ¨@@@¨@@¨¨¨
@¨@¨@¨¨¨@¨ ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« @@¨¨@@¨@¨¨
@@@@@@¨¨@@ ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ¨¨@¨@¨@@@¨
@¨¨¨¨¨@¨@¨ ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« @¨@@@@@¨¨@
¨@¨¨¨¨@@@@ ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ¨@@¨¨¨¨@¨@
@@@¨¨¨@¨¨¨ ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« @@¨@¨¨¨@@@
¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨¨ @¨@@@¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨@¨@¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« @@@¨¨@¨@@¨
~~~«~ ~ ««~ ~ «~ ~«
~ ~~ ~ ~ ¨ ~¨ ¨
¨ ¨ = ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.