RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@@@¨¨@@@@@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨@@¨¨@@@¨@
¨¨¨@¨@¨¨¨¨ @@¨@¨@¨¨@@
@¨¨@@@@¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @¨@@@@@¨@¨
@@¨@¨¨¨@¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@
¨¨@@@¨¨@@¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨@¨@¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨@¨¨@¨@¨@ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. @@@@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨@@¨@@@@@ ¨¨¨¨¨@¨@¨@
@¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨¨¨¨@@@@@
¨@@@@¨@¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨@@@¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨@@¨¨@@¨¨¨
¨@@¨¨@¨¨@¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @@¨@¨@¨@¨¨
¨@¨@¨@@¨@@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨@@@@@@@¨
¨@@@@@¨@@¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@@¨¨¨¨@@¨@ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨@
¨¨@¨¨¨@¨@@ @@¨¨@¨¨¨¨@
@¨@@¨¨@@@¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @¨@¨@@¨¨¨@
¨@@¨@¨@¨¨@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @@@@@¨@¨¨@
@@¨@@@@@¨@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨@
¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@
@¨@¨@¨¨¨@¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨¨¨@@¨@¨
@@@@@@¨¨@@ ¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@@
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨@¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@@ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨@@¨@@
@¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨
@@¨¨¨¨@¨@¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» @¨¨¨¨@@@¨@
¨¨@¨¨¨@@@@ ¨@¨¨¨@¨¨@@
@¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» @@@¨¨@@¨@¨
@@@¨@¨@@¨¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» @¨¨@¨@¨@@@
¨¨¨@@@@¨@¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨@¨@@@@@¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨@@@ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨@@@¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨ @@¨¨@¨¨¨@@
@¨¨@¨@¨@@¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» @¨@¨@@¨¨@¨
@@¨@@@@@¨@ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» @@@@@¨@¨@@
¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@@ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨¨¨¨@@@@¨
¨¨@¨@¨¨¨@¨ @¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@
@¨@@@@¨¨@@ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨@¨¨¨@@¨¨@
¨@@¨¨¨@¨@¨ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨@@¨¨@¨@¨@
@@¨@¨¨@@@@ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨@¨@¨@@@@@
¨¨@@@¨@¨¨¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨@@@@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨@@@¨¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» @@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@@¨@¨¨@¨ ¨¨@¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨¨@¨@@@¨@@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨@@¨¨@¨@¨
...». . »». . ». .»
. .. . . ¨ .¨ ¨
¨ ¨ % ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.