dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all  over  my vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in my  mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape.  to crawl on the floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if  you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick on  the  nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like  you do with a cat 
 who comes to  close  to your sandwich...