dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is completely calm  and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences  i can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my  nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you  wander too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick on  the  nose,  that's 
 what these are. like you do  with  a cat 
 who  comes  to close to your sandwich...