dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language,  sentences i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i  can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic  in it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my  nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick on the  nose, that's 
 what these are. like  you do  with a cat 
 who  comes to close to your  sandwich...