dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything is completely  calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the   fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences  i can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings  are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander  too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick on  the nose, that's 
 what  these are.  like you do with a cat 
 who comes to close  to your  sandwich...