RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨@¨¨¨@¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨ ¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨@¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨ ¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨@@@¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨@¨@@¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨¨@@@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ @¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨@¨¨¨@¨@@¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨@¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨@
@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨@¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨@¨@@¨¨@¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨@ @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨@¨@@¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨@@@ ¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨@ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ @¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨@
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ @@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ @¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ @¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨@¨¨@¨@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ¨¨@¨¨¨@@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@ ¨¨¨@¨¨@¨@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨@ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@@
:::~: : ~~: : ~: :~
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
¨ ¨ ^ ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.