RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ OPERATION. ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.