RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
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.#..###.## #.#...#.#.
.##.#..##. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN .###..####
##.###.#.# THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ##..#.#...
#.##..#### ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..#.####..
###.#.#... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. #.###...#.
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.#.#....#. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #..#.##.#.
.####...## THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ##.###.###
##...#..#. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO #.##..##..
#.#..##.## THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .##.#.#.#.
####.#.##. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ##.#######
....####.# DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE #.##......
....#...## COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) .##.#.....
....##..#. .#.###....
....#.#.## IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ####..#...
....#####. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR #...#.##..
....#....# COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ##..###.#.
....##...# WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..#.#..###
#...#.#..# OPERATION. #.####.#..
##..####.# .##...###.
#.#.#...## SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ##.#..#..#
.#####..#. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: #.###.##.#
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..#...###. ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ##.#.#.##.
..##..#..# ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ..######.#
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.######.## ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ .###....#.
.#.....##. ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ##..#...##
###....#.# ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ #.#.##..#.
#..#...### ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ .####.#.##
.#.##..#.. ##...####.
.###.#.##. ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ #.#..#...#
##..####.# ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ .###.##..#
..#.#...## ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ .#..##.#.#
#.####..#. .##.#.####
.##...#.## ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ##.####...
.#.#..###. ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ..##...#..
.####.#..# ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ #.#.#..##.
.#...###.# ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ .#####.#.#
###..#..## ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ##....####
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.