RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨§§¨¨¨§§§ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨¨§¨¨§§                                          ¨¨§¨¨§§§§§
¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨ THE  COMPUTER IS  A  VERY COMMON TOOL IN §¨¨¨¨¨§§§§
¨¨¨¨¨§§§§§ THE  FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨§§§¨¨§§¨
§§§§¨¨§§§¨ ITS JOB IS  TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨ CALCULATIONS  IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. §§¨¨¨§§§§¨
¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§                                          §¨¨§¨¨§§¨¨
§§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨ MOST  WORK  ON THE  PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
§§¨¨§§¨¨¨¨ THE  PROBLEM ON  A HILBERT  PLANE, WHICH §§§§§§§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT OF  CAUSALITY,  SO ¨§§§§§§¨¨¨
§§§§§§¨¨§§ THAT   DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM ¨¨§§§§¨¨§§
§§§§§¨¨¨¨§   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    §¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§
§§§§¨¨§§¨¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨         COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)          ¨§§§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§§§§§§                                          ¨¨§§¨¨§§§§
¨§§¨¨§§§§§   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   §¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§§ CLERKS TO  PRAY TO THE  "GODS"  OF THEIR ¨¨§§§§¨¨¨¨
§§§§§¨¨§§§ COMPUTER,  OR TO  THE DAEMONS DOING  THE ¨¨¨§§¨¨§§§
§§§§¨¨¨¨§§ WORK,  FOR  A   QUICK  AND  FAULT   FREE §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§§¨¨§§¨¨§                OPERATION.                §¨¨§§§§¨¨§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§§§§¨      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       §§§¨¨¨¨§§¨
§§¨¨§§§§¨¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    §§¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨                                          §¨¨¨¨¨¨§§¨
§§§§¨¨¨¨§§      ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #««      ¨¨§§§§¨¨¨¨
¨§§¨¨§§¨¨§        ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #««        ¨¨¨§§¨¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          §§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
§§§§§§§§§¨     ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #««     §¨¨§§§§§§§
§§§§§§§§¨¨    ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #««    ¨¨¨¨§§§§§§
§§§§§§§¨¨§     ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #««     ¨§§¨¨§§§§§
§§§§§§¨¨¨¨           ««# AND AT EASE #««            ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§§
§§§§§¨¨§§¨                                          §§§§§¨¨§§§
§§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨     ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #««     §§§§¨¨¨¨§§
§§§¨¨§§§§§     ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #««     §§§¨¨§§¨¨§
§§¨¨¨¨§§§§   ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #««   §§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§¨¨§§¨                                          §¨¨§§§§§§¨
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨   ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #««    ¨¨¨¨§§§§¨¨
¨¨¨§§§§§§¨    ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #««     §§§¨¨§§¨¨¨
§§¨¨§§§§¨¨     ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #««    §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§¨¨¨¨§§¨¨§      ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #««     §¨¨§§§§¨¨§
¨¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨       ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #««        ¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨¨§§§§¨                                          §§§¨¨¨¨§§§
¨¨§§¨¨§§¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« §§¨¨§§¨¨§§
           ^^^«^      ^   ««^  ^            «^   ^«           
           ^     ^^     ^      ^     ¨     ^¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  †      ¨           
                              ¨                               
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE    A    KIND     OF     PRAYER?           
           AS    IN,   YOU   MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK   FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS   BUGS,    LOTS    OF    IT.