dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is  completely calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over  my vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then i realize  i  can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic  in it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief,  such is my  nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my  eyes are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick on the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you do with a  cat 
 who comes to  close to  your sandwich...