dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything is  completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then   the  fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind.  it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what these are. like you  do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close  to your sandwich...