RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ---------------------------------------- §¨§§§¨§§¨§
§§¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨§§¨¨§§¨§§
¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER  IS A VERY  COMMON TOOL  IN ¨§¨§¨§¨§§¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS  EVEN NOW. ¨§§§§§§§¨§
§¨§§¨§§¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST  AMOUNTS  OF SMALL ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
¨§§¨§§¨§¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT  AMOUNT OF TIME. §§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨§¨§§¨§§§¨                                          ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§
§§§§¨§§¨¨§ MOST  WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES  OF POSING ¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§¨
§¨¨¨§§¨§¨§ THE PROBLEM  ON A  HILBERT  PLANE, WHICH §¨¨§¨§¨¨§§
¨§¨¨§¨§§§§ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT  OF CAUSALITY,  SO §§¨§§§§¨§¨
¨§§¨§§§¨¨¨ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE   PROBLEM ¨¨§§¨¨¨§§§
§§¨§§¨¨§¨¨    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   §¨§¨§¨¨§¨¨
§¨§§¨§¨§§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE §§§§§§¨§§¨
§§§¨§§§§¨§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         §¨¨¨¨¨§§¨§
¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§§                                          ¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨§¨§¨¨§¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨§§¨¨¨§§§¨
§§¨§§§§¨§§ CLERKS TO  PRAY  TO THE  "GODS" OF THEIR ¨§¨§¨¨§¨¨§
¨¨§§¨¨¨§§¨ COMPUTER,  OR TO THE  DAEMONS  DOING THE ¨§§§§¨§§¨§
§¨§¨§¨¨§¨§ WORK,  FOR   A  QUICK  AND   FAULT  FREE §§¨¨¨§§¨§§
¨§§§§§¨§§§                OPERATION.                §¨§¨¨§¨§§¨
¨§¨¨¨¨§§¨¨                                          ¨§§§¨§§§¨§
§§§¨¨¨§¨§¨       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      §§¨¨§§¨¨§§
¨¨¨§¨¨§§§§    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨¨§¨§¨§¨§¨
¨¨¨§§¨§¨¨¨                                          §¨§§§§§§§§
§¨¨§¨§§§¨¨      --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #--      ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
§§¨§§§¨¨§¨        --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #--        ¨§¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨§¨§§                                          §§§§§¨¨¨¨¨
§§§¨§¨§§§¨     --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #--     §¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
§¨¨§§§§¨¨§    --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #--    §§¨¨¨§§¨¨¨
§§¨§¨¨¨§¨§     --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #--     §¨§¨¨§¨§¨¨
§¨§§§¨¨§§§            --# AND AT EASE #--           §§§§¨§§§§¨
§§§¨¨§¨§¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§
¨¨¨§¨§§§§¨     --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #--     §¨¨¨§¨§¨¨§
§¨¨§§§¨¨¨§     --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #--     ¨§¨¨§§§§¨§
¨§¨§¨¨§¨¨§   --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #--   ¨§§¨§¨¨¨§§
§§§§§¨§§¨§                                          §§¨§§§¨¨§¨
§¨¨¨¨§§¨§§    --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #--   ¨¨§§¨¨§¨§§
¨§¨¨¨§¨§§¨    --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #--     ¨¨§¨§¨§§§¨
¨§§¨¨§§§¨§     --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #--    ¨¨§§§§§¨¨§
§§¨§¨§¨¨§§     --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #--      §¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§
¨¨§§§§§¨§¨       --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #--        §§§§¨¨¨§§§
§¨§¨¨¨¨§§§                                          ¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨
§§§§¨¨¨§¨¨ ---------------------------------------- ¨¨¨¨§§¨§§¨
           ^^^-^      ^   --^  ^            -^   ^-           
           ^     ^^     ^      ^     ¨     ^¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  $      ¨           
                              ¨                               
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO     BE    A    KIND    OF     PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU    MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D   ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS   OF    IT.