RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
......&&.. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« .&.&.&.&.&
.....&.&.& &&.&.&.&.&
....&&.&.& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN .&.&.&.&.&
...&.&.&.& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&.&.&.&.&
..&&.&.&.& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& OPERATION. &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# AND AT EASE #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« .&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« .&.&.&.&.&
~~~«~ ~ ««~ ~ «~ ~«
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.