RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
#...#..... «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ....#.....
..#...#### ###...###.
#...#..### THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ##..#..#..
..#.....## THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. #.........
#...###..# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..########
..#..#.... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ...#######
.......##. ##..#####.
######.... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #....###..
.####..### THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ..##..#...
..##....## IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ........##
.....##... THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM #######...
####....## WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE .#####..##
###..##..# DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ..###....#
##........ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ...#..##..
...######. ##........
##..####.. IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND #..#######
#....##..# CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ....######
..##...... COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ###..#####
.....####. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ##....###.
####..##.. OPERATION. ...##..#..
.##....... ##........
....###### SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ...#######
.##..####. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ##..#####.
......##.. #....###..
#####..... ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ..##..#..#
####..#### ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« #.........
.##....##. ..#######.
....##.... ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ...#####..
###....### ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ##..###..#
##..##..## ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« #....#....
.........# ««# AND AT EASE #«« ..##...##.
########.. #....#....
.######... ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ..##...##.
..####..## ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« .....#....
#..##....# ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ####...###
......##.. .##..#..##
.####..... ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ..........
..##..#### ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« .#########
.......### ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« ..#######.
######..#. ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ...#####..
.####..... ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ##..###...
..##..###. #....#..##
.......#.. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ..##......
,,,«, , ««, , «, ,«
, ,, , , . ,. .
. . * .
.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.