dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences  i can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the floor  searching 
 relief, such is  my  nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my  eyes are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick  on the nose, that's 
 what these  are. like you do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...