EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN THE  WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST  FEW TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF  SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO NOT  LIKE, AND THERE  WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD AVOID  TO RUIN ALL  THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED OR  AT  LEAST  THE BURN-INS IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I  JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED  AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A  LOAD OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE  DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND  (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT I THINK IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.