EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW USEFUL THEY  HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS  THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT  LIKE,  AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I SHOULD  AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR AT LEAST  THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE  EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE.  BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE.  MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD OF CONCEPTS THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,   NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I HEAR THIS  SOUND (A  REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS  ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO  STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.