dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is  completely calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then   the  fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all  over my vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape.  to crawl on the floor searching 
 relief,  such is my  nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander too  far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick  on  the nose,  that's 
 what these  are. like you do  with a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...