RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨                                          §¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨ THE  COMPUTER IS  A VERY COMMON  TOOL IN §§¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME  WAYS EVEN NOW. §§§¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS  OF  SMALL §¨§§¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT  OF TIME. ¨¨§§§¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨§                                          ¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES  OF  POSING ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON  A  HILBERT PLANE,  WHICH ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨ IS  THEN FOLDED  OUT  OF  CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN   SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM §¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨¨§§§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨¨§¨§§         COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)          ¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨¨§§                                          ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨¨§¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨ CLERKS  TO  PRAY TO THE  "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨ COMPUTER,  OR TO THE DAEMONS  DOING  THE ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨ WORK,  FOR   A  QUICK   AND  FAULT  FREE §¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨                OPERATION.                ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§                                          ¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨      »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»»      ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨        »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»»        ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨                                          §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨     »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»»     §§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨    »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»»    ¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨§§§     »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»»     ¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§           »»# AND AT EASE #»»            ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§                                          ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨§     »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»»     ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨     »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»»     ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨   »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»»   ¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨    »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»»   ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§     »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»»    ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨     »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»»    §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨¨     »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»»      ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨¨       »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»»        ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
           ,,,»,     ,   »»,   ,            »,   ,»           
           ,     ,,     ,     ,      ¨     ,¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  †      ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO     BE    A    KIND     OF    PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU   MAKE    A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,    BEAUTIFUL,   AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR   A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE   HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF    IT.