RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨@¨@¨@@¨@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨ @¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@¨@@ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨@@ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨¨@¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨@¨¨@¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨@¨¨@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨@
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@
@¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨
¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨@ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨
¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@
@¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨@¨¨@¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨@¨¨@¨¨@¨ OPERATION. ¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨@ ¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@ @¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» @@¨¨¨@¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ¨@@@¨¨¨@¨@
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» @¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨
¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» @@¨¨¨@@@¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨ @@@¨¨@¨@@¨
¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» @¨@@¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨@@@¨¨@¨@
@@¨¨¨@¨@@¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨@
¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@ ¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨@
¨@@@¨¨¨@¨@ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¨¨¨@¨@@¨¨
¨@¨@@¨¨¨¨@ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨@ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨@@
@¨¨@¨@@¨¨¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» @¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
@@¨¨¨@@@¨¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» @@¨¨¨¨¨¨@¨
@@@¨¨@¨@@¨ @@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
@¨@@¨¨¨@@@ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» @¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.