party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower  curtains drawn.  floor full 
 of dirty clothes,  of garbage, and  as i 
 start to unzip  my pants,  she steps out 
 of   the   shower   and   pushes  me  to 
 theground. 
  
 i  wish  to   be   contacted   by   some 
 [god, alien] who  would  bestow  upon me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right forever.  what i  don't 
 know  is  that  this  happens   multiple 
 times  per second  - they ask  me: "when 
 you  said  the  world egg was your ideal 
 body type, did you  mean it"?  i  answer 
 "not really, but  i can act like  it for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of the encounter  and  moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom