FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH  (THE PLANET WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF US HAVE  ANTENNAS ON  OUR  HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS FOR  LARGER  BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO  ORBIT),  WE'VE BUILT LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA  WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION  IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT  IN   THE   GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN  THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS  PLACE IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND  THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF THE GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE GALAXY  IS MOVING  TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND  WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE ALL  THIS,  DESPITE ALL  OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO PROGRAMMES OUT  IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE  UNIVERSE SAY IT'S BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A  CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE STAR  (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE  HAVE NO 
 IDEA  WHAT WE'RE DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA  GO  SMOKE MY THIRD CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND TRY  TO SNATCH  SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING