FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE PLANET  WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF US HAVE ANTENNAS  ON  OUR  HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE  AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH  A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE  LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT  IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT  IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS  PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND  THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER OF  THE  GALAXY  AT VELOCITY  AND 
 THE GALAXY  IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND THE GALAXY. AND WE AS  A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES  OUT IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED  OF LIGHT (LIGHT  IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS  TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY IT'S  BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT  KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE  AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE  DOING (AND IT  PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO  SMOKE MY  THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR  AND TRY TO  SNATCH SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING