FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH  (THE  PLANET  WHERE I  LIVE) A 
 LOT OF  US HAVE  ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR   BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER  BANDWITH, WE HAVE 
     BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR      
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO ORBIT),  WE'VE BUILT  LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH  A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT  OUR POSITION IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE   GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL  CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR  LOCAL  CLUSTERS PLACE IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING  AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE GALAXY AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE GALAXY  IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND WE  AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES  OUT  IN FUCKING SPACE 
 AT  THE SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO      ONE       HAS        ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY IT'S BECAUSE  YOU  NEED 
 A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR  AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE  AWAY FROM THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT   REALLY   ISN'T  THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE  NO 
 IDEA  WHAT WE'RE DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO SMOKE  MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR AND TRY TO SNATCH  SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING