FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH (THE PLANET  WHERE  I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT  OF US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON OUR  HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE  HAVE   BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS FOR LARGER  BANDWITH,  WE  HAVE 
     BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR      
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE  AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA  WITH A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED  ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT  IN   THE   GALAXY,  AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL  CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY  AND THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE  GALAXY AT VELOCITY  AND 
 THE GALAXY  IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND  THE GALAXY.  AND WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE  ALL THIS, DESPITE  ALL OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO PROGRAMMES  OUT  IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S  BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT   REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES  THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE  DOING (AND IT  PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO  SMOKE MY  THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR  AND TRY TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING