RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨§¨§¨§§¨§ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨§§§¨§¨§¨¨
¨¨§§§§§¨§§                                          §§¨¨§§§§§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§¨ THE  COMPUTER IS A  VERY  COMMON TOOL IN §¨§¨§¨¨¨¨§
§¨§§¨¨¨§¨§ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS  EVEN NOW. §§§§§§¨¨¨§
¨§§¨§¨¨§§§ ITS JOB IS TO  DO  VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
§§¨§§§¨§¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT  OF TIME. §¨¨¨¨¨§§¨§
¨¨§§¨¨§§§¨                                          §§¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨§¨§¨§¨¨§ MOST WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES  OF  POSING §¨§¨¨¨§§§¨
§§§§§§§§¨§ THE  PROBLEM ON A  HILBERT  PLANE, WHICH §§§§¨¨§¨¨§
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT  OF CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE   PROBLEM §¨¨¨§§§¨§§
¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§   WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE    ¨§¨¨§¨¨§§¨
¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨§§¨§§¨§¨§
§§¨§¨¨¨¨§§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         §§¨§§¨§§§§
¨¨§§§¨¨¨§¨                                          §¨§§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨¨§§   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   §§§¨§§¨§¨¨
¨¨§§¨§§¨§¨ CLERKS TO  PRAY TO  THE  "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨§§¨§§§¨
¨¨§¨§§¨§§§ COMPUTER, OR  TO  THE DAEMONS  DOING THE §¨¨§¨§§¨¨§
§¨§§§¨§§¨¨ WORK,  FOR  A  QUICK   AND   FAULT  FREE §§¨§§§¨§¨§
¨§§¨¨§§¨§¨                OPERATION.                §¨§§¨¨§§§§
§§¨§¨§¨§§§                                          ¨§§¨§¨§¨¨¨
§¨§§§§§§¨¨       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      ¨§¨§§§§§¨¨
§§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§                                          ¨§¨¨§¨¨¨§§
¨§¨§§¨¨¨§¨      ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #««      §§§¨§§¨¨§¨
¨§§§¨§¨¨§§        ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #««        §¨¨§§¨§¨§§
§§¨¨§§§¨§¨                                          ¨§¨§¨§§§§¨
§¨§¨§¨¨§§§     ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #««     §§§§§§¨¨¨§
¨§§§§§¨§¨¨    ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #««    ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
§§¨¨¨¨§§§¨     ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #««     §¨¨¨¨¨§§¨§
¨¨§¨¨¨§¨¨§            ««# AND AT EASE #««           §§¨¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨§§¨¨§§¨§                                          ¨¨§¨¨¨§§§¨
§§§¨§¨§¨§§     ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #««     §¨§§¨¨§¨¨§
¨¨¨§§§§§§¨     ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #««     §§§¨§¨§§¨§
§¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§   ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #««   ¨¨¨§§§§¨§§
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§                                          ¨¨¨§¨¨¨§§¨
¨§§§¨§¨¨¨§   ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #««    ¨¨¨§§¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨§§§¨¨§     ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #««    §¨¨§¨§¨§§§
¨¨§¨§¨¨§¨§     ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #««    §§¨§§§§§¨¨
¨¨§§§§¨§§§      ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #««     ¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨§§¨¨        ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #««       ¨¨§¨§¨¨¨§§
§¨§§¨¨§¨§¨                                          ¨¨§§§§¨¨§¨
§§§¨§¨§§§§ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« §¨§¨¨¨§¨§§
           ...«.     .   ««.   .            «.   .«           
           .     ..     .     .     ¨      .¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  =      ¨           
                               ¨                              
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE    A     KIND    OF     PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU    MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING   YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR   A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS   BUGS,    LOTS    OF    IT.