dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the   fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all  over  my vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i realize  i  can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick  on the  nose,  that's 
 what these are.  like you do with a  cat 
 who comes to close to  your  sandwich...