THE   GOLDEN         
              M               
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN  IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES, AND IN  THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER  A FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD TAVERN HAD  THEIR  MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER  TIME IN EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY  STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY  YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS   A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL  THAT OF A  COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A  HARDHAT  AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING.  THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND  ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED    TO   LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY  HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR  COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT  OF THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!