RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
@¨@@@¨@¨@¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ @¨@@@@@¨@¨
@@@¨¨@@@@@ ¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@
¨¨¨@¨@¨¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @@¨@¨¨¨@¨¨
¨¨¨@@@@¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. @¨@@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨@¨¨¨@¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨@@¨¨@¨@¨@
@¨¨@@¨¨@@¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨@¨@¨@@@@@
¨@¨@¨@¨@¨@ @@@@@@¨¨¨¨
¨@@@@@@@@@ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @¨@¨¨¨@¨@¨
¨@¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨@@@¨¨@@@@
@@@@@¨¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @@¨¨@¨@¨¨¨
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @¨@¨@@@@¨¨
@@¨¨¨@@¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @@@@@¨¨¨@¨
@¨@¨¨@¨@¨¨ @¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@
¨@@@¨@@@@¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨@¨¨¨@@¨@¨
¨@¨¨@@¨¨¨@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @@@¨¨@¨@@@
@@@¨@¨@¨¨@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @¨¨@¨@@@¨¨
@¨¨@@@@@¨@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨@¨@@@¨¨@¨
@@¨@¨¨¨¨@@ OPERATION. @@@@¨¨@¨@@
¨¨@@@¨¨¨@¨ @¨¨¨@¨@@@¨
¨¨@¨¨@¨¨@@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨@¨¨@@@¨¨@
@¨@@¨@@¨@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨@@¨@¨¨@¨@
¨@@¨@@¨@@@ @@¨@@@¨@@@
@@¨@@¨@@¨¨ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨@@¨¨
@¨@@¨@@¨@¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ @¨@¨@¨@¨@¨
@@@¨@@¨@@@ ¨@@@@@@@@@
¨¨¨@@¨@@¨¨ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨@@¨@¨ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨@@@ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ @¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨¨ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨@@¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨@¨@¨ @@¨@@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@¨@@@@@ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ @¨@¨@¨@@¨¨
¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ¨@@@@@@¨@¨
¨¨¨@@¨@@¨¨ @@¨¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨@¨@@¨@¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨
@@¨@@@¨@@@ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ @¨@@¨¨¨@@¨
@¨@@¨¨@@¨¨ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ @@@¨@¨¨@¨@
¨@@¨@¨@¨@¨ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨¨¨@@@¨@@@
@@¨@@@@@@@ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ¨¨¨@¨¨@@¨¨
@¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ @¨¨@@¨@¨@¨
@@@¨@¨¨¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨@¨@¨@@@@@
^^^~^ ^ ~~^ ^ ~^ ^~
^ ^^ ^ ^ ¨ ^¨ ¨
¨ ¨ = ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.