FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE PLANET  WHERE  I  LIVE) A 
 LOT OF  US  HAVE  ANTENNAS ON OUR HOUSES 
 OR   BALCONIES,  WE  HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH,  WE HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT),  WE'VE  BUILT LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH  A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE  LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT   IN   THE  GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE  LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS  PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND  THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF THE  GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE  ALL THIS, DESPITE  ALL  OUR 
    (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR   
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES  OUT  IN FUCKING SPACE 
 AT  THE SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS  OUR 
  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), 
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO      ONE        HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY IT'S BECAUSE  YOU NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE  STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY  ISN'T   THAT   KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I  THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT  WE'RE DOING  (AND IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO SMOKE  MY  THIRD CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR AND TRY TO SNATCH SOME  BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING